How to Cope with the Death of a Dog: Advice from a Psychologist

The death of a beloved dog is a profound grief for every owner. Whatever the cause, this event always leaves an indelible mark on the soul, but life doesn't end there, and one must learn to cope with the shock. The hardest part of this situation is surviving the first few days, when, in addition to the difficult emotional state, one must also deal with other issues related to the death of a pet.

Psychological advice

For many, a dog becomes a true member of the family, so its death is as tragic as the loss of a loved one. Psychologist Julie Axerold believes that after a dog's death, a person loses not only a pet but also a source of unconditional love, a constant companion who provides comfort and security, and a ward for whom the owner acts as a mentor, much like a child. How can one cope with this period? Our culture lacks rituals to help cope with loss (obituaries, memorial days), so sometimes it's easier to follow some recommendations from psychologists. Although these recommendations are quite simple, it's not always possible to follow them during periods of intense grief.

Key recommendations:

• Don't assign blame, especially if your pet died due to illness or injury. It's important to recognize that even ideal owners and experienced vets sometimes make mistakes, so it's important not to blame yourself with phrases like, "I didn't have time," or "I chose the wrong vet." Every owner does their best, so the most important thing is that their dog lived a happy life in a caring environment.
• Take a break and wait for the pain to subside. Don't rush into searching for a replacement for the lost pet, as this can lead to comparisons between different animals, which are often unfavorable to the new pet. After the loss, it's best to limit contact with familiar dog owners, visits to your usual pet store, or veterinary clinic to avoid unnecessary questions and reminiscing.
• Fill the void. Dog owners develop a unique rhythm and schedule, which can revolve around their pet's needs (e.g., daily walks, feeding schedule, etc.). Lifestyle changes are one of the most powerful sources of stress, so it's important to find a new hobby or activity to occupy the freed-up time. This could include taking English or programming classes, going to the gym, or renovating your own apartment—anything that will take your mind off pain and sad thoughts.
• Remember only the good. Immediately after a dog's death, the memory most often turns to the period when the dog was already sick or old, but you should try to push these thoughts aside. After all, there were many other, more pleasant moments in the dog's life: awkward puppyhood, the first training lessons, shared walks and trips, and other occasions that deserve to be highlighted. To reinforce positive emotions, you can create a photo album or frames, and after a while, memories of your pet will bring only smiles, not tears.

• Get rid of reminders. Hide all reminders of the loss (collar, leash, food bowl, toys). You can give them to friends or donate them to a dog shelter, where they'll surely be put to good use.
• Help other animals. Psychologists believe that helping a dog shelter is a good way to quickly overcome difficult emotional states. Knowing that your help brings joy and benefit to someone will eventually displace negative emotions.
• Get a puppy. This advice is the last one, for good reason, as you shouldn't think about a new pet until the pain of loss has subsided. If the thought of a new puppy involuntarily brings up comparisons, like how it will never be as smart or loyal, it's best to abandon the idea for now. Otherwise, the new family member won't be able to fully receive the care and love of its owner and give them new, vibrant emotions.

What to do when a dog dies

Death from an accident or injury, a long battle with a dangerous or incurable disease—no matter how much one might want to change the situation, the owner is faced with the fact: the dog has died, and something must be done. One of the pressing questions is what to do with the body, since it needs to be buried.

Responsibility for the burial of a pet falls entirely on the owner, but in Russia this issue remains unresolved. According to the law, there are two options for the disposal of deceased animals: cremation or decontamination in Beccari pits, which are located in most major cities.

Sometimes pet owners choose to bury their animals after they die and even erect a monument, for which purpose entire animal cemeteries are organized in some cities.

Important! Never bury a pet in a park, dacha, or forest, especially if it died from an infectious disease. Pathogens can survive in the soil for decades and are eventually carried by groundwater into wells and boreholes, potentially triggering a dangerous epidemic.

Private veterinary clinics and centers with their own crematoriums also provide assistance in this matter. Their staff are ready to come at any time to collect the body of a deceased dog and transport it for an autopsy and subsequent cremation. These centers offer two cremation options:

• common - several corpses are burned in the chamber at the same time, the ashes of which are mixed, but the owner can take part of it with the thought that there is a part of his pet there too.
• Individual – involves burning one animal's body in one chamber, so the owner can be sure that the urn contains only the ashes of his dog.

The memory of pets can also be immortalized in virtual cemeteries, which are organized on social media or special websites. These sites offer the option of registering a personal page where you can not only post a photo of your deceased pet but also receive psychological support and grief counseling from other pet owners.

How do dogs sense death?

There is no definitive answer to the question of whether dogs sense their death, but it is not uncommon for old and sick animals to leave the home, and the owner later finds the body and realizes that the departure was intentional.

There are several theories to explain this behavior. Some believe that the animal is trying to ease a person's pain and sadness by leaving, but this theory is untrue. To act this way, one would need a human consciousness, since only humans are capable of thinking about and fearing death. However, animals do this unconsciously, as for them, life and death are equally natural. American psychologists believe their intelligence is comparable to that of a 2-3-year-old child, who also doesn't understand that death is irreversible.

According to biologists, a pet's departure from home before death can be explained by the same reasons as a sick or elderly wolf leaving a pack. The dog's consciousness becomes clouded, so the habits acquired over years of living with humans displace the more ancient instincts inherent in all canines:

• a weak individual who cannot run fast and hunt successfully will be a burden to the pack;
• a weak individual can be easy prey and thus attract the attention of a pack of other predators;
• If you don’t hide, there is a risk of encountering a large predator and dying painfully after being torn apart;
• If you die in a pack, the decomposition products will negatively impact the health of the young.

It's assumed that these are the impulses that drive an animal when it leaves its owner. However, pets that retain consciousness and affection don't always succumb to these instincts, and so they are left to die in the home where they spent their entire lives.

Legend has it that all dying dogs go to the Rainbow Bridge. It's a kind of canine paradise, where they are freed from all ailments and feel neither hunger nor fear. They can spend time endlessly playing with other deceased animals, so it's a relief to know all their hardships are behind them. Moreover, at the Rainbow Bridge, dogs have another pleasure they couldn't have in life due to their limited vision: they can see all the colors of the rainbow.

Read also:

• A dog's age in human years
• My dog ​​is urinating blood: why and how to treat it
• How dogs see our world